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If I broke down or anything, not only was I now basically out of water…but I also had no way to call my boss and let him know I was stranded, so I’d probably get fired as a no-call, no-show ( I was kinda low on gas…D’OH!!!So we got up at like 6am, filled our empty water jugs with totally non-potable hot springs water (hey, in an emergency it would be better than nothing!!The forums I read online advised that one drive no faster than 5 mph (FIVE MILES PER HOUR!!! This road is R E M O T E as F U C K, with virtually nonexistent vehicle traffic, and as mentioned ZERO cell phone coverage (this was back in 2011, but I’m sure it’s the same today). Plus, the road was so bumpy that the firewood ended up poking a hole in one of my water jugs, so that it leaked out and I ended up only having 2 gallons for the two of us all weekend. From Vegas, we drove up through Pahrump to Death Valley…and then all the way across Death Valley to the western edge, sort of near Panamint Springs.
Anyhoo, Boris and I kind of ambled around, soaking in the springs (naked, of course) and checking stuff out.
It was actually kind of scary, and one of the only experiences I’ve had where my life was in actual danger.
But that always makes for the funnest adventures…no?
Apparently, a hardcore desert kook (I use this term affectionately, FYI — I consider myself a desert kook too, ya know) named Lizard Lee lives out there and takes care of the place — unofficially, of course, since it’s part of Death Valley now and he is most remote that no one from the Park Service even bothers to fuck with them out there, so they’re all naked all day, every day, and pretty much left to their own devices.
Lizard Lee had a pretty elaborate compound cobbled together out there, made from trailers and spare odds and ends of sheet metal (how he got that stuff in there, I’ll never know — I guess there’s another, slightly easier access road in from the California side)…but alas, at the time of my visit, Lee was out of town visiting his long-distance girlfriend in San Francisco or somewhere, so we didn’t get to meet him (how he was able to maintain a long-distance relationship without cell-phone coverage is beyond me…although there was a satellite phone, for emergencies…so maybe he used that for phone sex).
I didn’t bother with any makeup, since why the fuck — but wouldn’t you know it, about halfway through the day these Jeeps came joggling down one of the side roads carrying a bunch of photo equipment, and these two photographers got out and approached me where I was standing around naked.